Learn To Love Yourself First

What is the first thing that you usually do when you wake up in the morning? Do you stretch and smile, eager to start your day? Or do you throw the covers back over your head, wishing that you could “fast-forward” past the day and all of the responsibilities that await you? When your feet finally meet the floor and you make your way towards the bathroom, do you smile at the person staring back at you in the mirror? You should, because that is the only person who you can truly depend on to make you happy. When you put your happiness in the hands of others, you will soon realize that you will be setting yourself up for disappointment.

You’d be surprised to find out how much joy you can bring into your life by simply treating yourself good. Self boosters such as smiling every time you pass a mirror and telling yourself how gorgeous you are can make a huge difference in the way you feel about yourself. Think of how good it makes you feel when a stranger pays you a compliment or when someone tells you how brilliant they think your ideas are. The truth is we don’t really need others to make us feel this way. Even though it’s nice to hear these kinds of things from others, we possess the ability to create this for ourselves, but only ten times better.

Just as others can easily make us feel good about ourselves, they can also say things that can easily lower our self esteem. For instance, overhearing someone mention how big your thighs are, or a group of kids on the bus laughing as they use you as an example of a whale. A person with a healthy self esteem would not be affected by such things. We are all aware of our personal flaws, and trust me, we all have them, but once we learn to accept the ones that can’t be changed as a part of who we are and make an effort to change what we want to change, only then will we see that others will accept us too.

Talk to yourself...

Don’t worry; no one will think you’re crazy--if they do just sarcastically invite them to try it for themselves. In a world where talking to ourselves would label us nutty, it is completely normal and extremely healthy in one particular sense. When we make it a habit to tell ourselves positive things, and use words such as “I can” and “I will” instead of words like “I can’t”; we simply eliminate any room left for negativity to affect our lives.

Positive thoughts and positive actions can only lead to positive results. Tell yourself how proud you are of you and don’t be afraid to give yourself a hug from time to time. Often times, our past can find ways to blind us from our promising futures. Always remind yourself that “yesterday is gone, forget about it--today is here, enjoy it!” Learn to accept each new day as a brand new adventure, with a brand new opportunity, to make it better than you could ever imagine. Even when times are not so good, understanding that you hold the power to make it better will grant you a sense of peace.

Patience enables our hopes and dreams to become a reality…

Living in this day and time, stress seems to lurk under everything we fix our eyes on. With matters of employment, obtaining a job is difficult within itself; but lacking a college education can bring a person to feel as low as the sugar settled to the bottom of a cup of coffee. Another thing, the cost of living often exceeds the average salary; forcing many of us to take on additional jobs in order to barely “get by”. Money has a tendency to greatly affect our happiness, wellbeing, confidence, and self worth; it can literally alter the way we view the world. When we are unemployed, we may feel worthless, we may feel like a failure more than anything else, and worry about how the rest of the world perceives us.

There is a saying that goes “Why stress what cannot be changed in a moment’s time”. Being hard on yourself will only make matters worse and will only put a damper on your spirit. Instead, do something nice for yourself that will help lift your spirits; even if only for the time being. The key is learning how to take a step at a time. Reducing stress will help you to focus more energy into the things that you are trying to accomplish. Some enjoyable stress relievers include warm baths, reading, listening to music, reading a book, taking a walk, enjoying the company of family and friends, cooking, meditating, and basking under the gentle glow of scented candles.

Nothing is EVER as bad as it may seem…

Our minds are powerful tools, and if we allow it, they can take us on irrational rollercoasters. Think back to when you were a child; did a monster ever actually come out from under your bed or come leaping out of your closet? I would hope not! Use that same general idea and apply it to some of your fears as an adult. The only differences are upgraded fears and wisdom due to age. The only thing you possibly have to fear about your life is fear itself. It is because of fear and doubt that we are so hard on ourselves. When you finally learn and make a choice to become your own best friend, every time you walk past a mirror, the words “I love you too” will surely find a way to escape from your lips.

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